Lord, don’t give up on me.

Ok, so here is what I know at this very moment. We are completely moved out the rental house. There is still construction going on in my home from 8am-5pm every day but Sunday. The first real walk-in closet I’ve ever had has been built, I’m just waiting on rods for the shelves. All the furniture, clothes, and belonging get delivered starting Tuesday. I am extremely excited. I am also extremely hot because the insulation in the attic had to be moved for the electrician so the air conditioner is working hard for nothing. The electrician can’t finish the electrical until the cabinets are installed. Long story short, I am gonna be hot for about three weeks or so I’ve been told. I learned that I get mean when I’m hot…

Which I suppose is exactly why the AC is out in my car and has been for going on three summers. Which I suppose is exactly why the AC ordered for my bedroom got back ordered, twice. The youth I work with run around the house saying: “God don’t like ugly.” Well, Lord, I guess You don’t. Obviously, I still need to learn how to be nice when I’m hot and sweaty. Obviously, it is a lesson meant to be learned the hard way.

It feels like the devil is digging a circle around me, trying to knock me down, but I’m standing on The Rock so he can’t. He’s just digging deeper and deeper, digging until he’s completely under The Rock, until the ground underneath crumbles. But I’m ready for it this time so I’m holding on and not caught off guard. Then The Rock hits solid ground and I’m still standing firm on The Rock. So, the devil just has to start all over digging holes. I think the devil has just always been digging holes, but I wasn’t so ready before because I was holding onto other things while I was standing on The Rock. I had to learn to drop everything else piece by piece in order to keep my balance and hold onto The Rock.

They say the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, expecting a different result. Who is the crazy one now? I am changing what I was doing. I am altering my environment. Just because I am in the same place, does not mean I am the same person. The only thing with power over me is You, Father. You are The Rock. You are my firm foundation. You are my resting place, my safe place. You are where my strength comes from when the whole world crumbles around me.

So, this is my prayer today. I pray that continuing forward, I stay cool, calm, and collected as temperatures rise. I pray that I am yours. I pray that I am kind. I pray that I am compassionate. I pray that I am patient. I pray that I am loving. I pray that I am giving. I pray that I really start livin. I pray that I continue learning to trust you. I pray that I keep my eyes focused on you. I pray that I keep my battle armor ready. I pray that I look to you and not the dirt around me. I pray that even when the dirt surrounds me, I pray I ain’t getting my boots dusty. And as always I pray for my family and sorority sisters. I pray for my university. I pray for guidance for our government, church, and school leaders. I pray for protection for our troops. I pray for all of those that need you now and for those that haven’t met you yet. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

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