I had this dream when I was a kid that I was going to find the love of my life at church. I was going to be standing there worshiping and he was going to see me and see my love for You. I was going to be that woman in Craig Morgan’s song: That’s What I Love About Sunday. “Sweet Miss Betty likes to sing off key in the pew behind me.” I might sing terribly to everyone else but You listen for the heart. He was gonna listen for that too and he was just going to know I was the one.
I have been trying to be that woman my entire life. I have made more than my share of mistakes and I am far from perfect but I have been in awe of You and all that You’ve blessed me with. I am trying to be the woman You created me to be. I want to be the kind of woman Eric Church sings about in Like Jesus Does. I think I forgot the other part of the dream. Somehow, along the way, I forgot that I want him to love like You do too. I think I let my dream become one sided and only focused on me and the kind of woman I am becoming. I have been praying for him since I was a little girl and the older I get, the more frequently and intentionally I pray for him. I want to love like You and I want him to want the same thing. I want the man in Sanctus Real’s song: Lead Me.
I am not praying for perfection. Although, I’ve been told too many times that I have unrealistic expectations, but a friend reminded me tonight that I deserve all that I am willing to give. I want to the woman You created me to be and I want him to be the man You created him to be. That’s not asking for too much. You have a plan for my life and You have a plan for his. It’s as simple as that. You are the planner. Not me. I surrendered control of my life a long time ago. You are the one leading me and I want You to be the one leading him too. Casting Crowns pretty much summed it up for me:
“Lord of all creation holds our lives in His hands
The God of all the nations holds our lives in His hands
The Rock of our salvation holds our lives in His hands
He cares for them just as He cares for you
So love them like Jesus, love them like Jesus
You don’t need the answers to all of life’s questions
Just know that He loves them and stay by their side
Love them like Jesus
Love them like Jesus”
So, that is my prayer today. I pray that he loves like you do. I pray that he is intentional. I pray that he is strong. I pray that he is kind. I pray that he is filled with your joy. I pray that he believes in you. I pray that he is giving. I pray that he is sincere. I pray that he is positive. I pray that he is devoted to you. I pray that he does things wholeheartedly. I pray that he leads me closer to you. I pray that he is forgiving. I pray that he is spirited. I pray that he is willing to fight for you. I pray that you lead him. I pray that he becomes everything you need him to be. I pray that I keep praying for him everyday. I pray that he knows you’re always with him and he’s never alone. And as always I pray for my family and sorority sisters. I pray for my university. I pray for guidance for our government, church, and school leaders. I pray for protection for our troops. I pray for all of those that need you now and for those that haven’t met you yet. In Jesus’ name, Amen.